As a therapist based out of Westchester, New York, I’m centered in one of the hot spots for the Coronavirus spread. Mental Wealth Practice’s brick-and-mortar site is located about 25 minutes north of Manhattan. Initially, this gave me 3 major concerns: The wellbeing of the clients I already work with, my ability to work with new clients who may be seeking services, and my ability to meet my overhead and keep my business running

A moment in history and a moment of pride

To put into context in case this is read years later, at the time that I am writing this, the Coronavirus COVID-19 reached Westchester about 1 month ago and has began to spread at an exponential level. To avoid the infection and death rates that has been seen in other countries, people across the country in the United States are quarantining themselves, shutting down their businesses as regulated by the government, and working from home. What better time to halt therapy? Surely clients wouldn’t come in person when they are being told how important it is to stay in their homes. Much to my surprise, people adapt and show their commitment to their own health.

My clients continue to attend their scheduled sessions, albeit mostly through webcam services such as FaceTime and Zoom. I have been so impressed by the commitment my clients have had to their own mental health and by their support to my organization. Without them, I would never be able to imagine affording to keep my practice running and open to the public. If by some chance you are a client of mine and you are reading this post – Thank you, from the bottom of my heart. And also kudos to you for continuing to work on improving yourself no matter the circumstances.

To potential new clients:

Our mental health is just as important as our physical health – one supports the other.  I implore you to get yourself some help if you need someone to talk to because you have cabin fever, if your job refuses to shut down, you got laid off, you’re weary about all of the misinformation you’ve been hearing, or god forbid a loved one is sick. Of course I’d love to be the person that you work with, but no matter what you should find yourself support from someone in the field. My practice is offering HIPPA-compliant mental-health services through several webcam services including Facetime, Zoom, and Facebook Messenger. Once life begins to go back to normal, we can resume in-peron treatment if you’d like to make that transition.  We are also accepting United Health Care, Optum, Oscar, Aetna, Cigna, Beacon, and Humana at this time. Thank you all again.

The post How to Get Mental Health Treatment Despite the Coronavirus COVID-19 appeared first on Frankie Grixti.

After about 2 years of hard work behind the scenes, I am proud to finally announce the official opening of my private practice office in Hartsdale, New York

I have done my homework, put in the time, and am very excited to announce that Mental Wealth Practice, PLLC is open for business and taking new clients now!

I am currently accepting Cigna and Humana health insurances. You can also find my out-of-network rates here

I love the work I do as a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and always wanted to open a practice of my own where I can work with private clients. I’ve been working with a handful of clients part time throughout the developmental stages of this project and I feel blessed to say that everything has gone great so far. Now, I am humbly opening my doors to the public!
As you can imagine, it is very challenging to get a new business off the ground. Help spread the word with a Like & a Share Thank you for your support everyone. Feel free to contact me with any questions you may have about the services I provide!

The post The Grand Opening of Mental Wealth Practice appeared first on Frankie Grixti.

The impact of role models on children

In my field, I am always thinking about what is important for a developing mind. I am consistently a big advocate for getting children involved in sports. Sports can help a developing youth in so many ways:

• Creates a community for the child to be involved in, gives them something to progress towards
• Allows for the benefits of leisure
• Provides an outlet for their energy, gives the joy of victory, and teaches the humility behind loss.
• For the sake of this post, another very important benefit is that the child will ideally develops a bond between the child and an important role model – his or her coach. (For the sake of this post, this is what we’ll be focusing on)

Does it absolutely HAVE to be sports that the child is involved in? No, of course not. Adjust to what works for your child and your family. No matter what the activity is, you should NEVER underestimate the benefit of a coach, mentor, teacher, or role model. Preferably, this person will sit in some sort of “leadership” position in the child’s life.

But what type of leadership?

1. Let’s start with INTENTION

Working with countless families, I have heard stories about both fulfilling and disappointing experiences with coaches and mentors. In my experience, the determining factor tends to be related to the intentions of the person in the leadership position. It may come as a surprise to some, but not all of the people guiding our children have selfless intentions.

Organizational politics, expectations of outcome, and reputation drive many of the programs that the youth is involved in. This impacts many people placed in roles of leading children and adolescents. Poor leaders may learn to operate in such a way that puts their own interests above the interests of the children they work with. HOWEVER, please do not confuse poor leaders with those who have high expectation of the children being guided. As a matter of fact, this is a POSITIVE quality. We want leaders that push their kids to be the best that they can be and give them their best chance at making progress towards their goals (whatever that may look like for the goals of any given individual, group, or team).

The NEGATIVE quality of many leaders comes in when they seem to operate in such a way that suggests that they expect the children to work for them – they no longer work for the children. I have seen coaches halt relationships with children that they are “butting heads with.” The outcome can lead to the child being discouraged from continuing with the activity and participating in another sport or hobby. In the worst cases, I’ve seen children withdraw from positive influencers in general and become seemingly self-destructive. The best leaders will turn these moments into learning opportunities.

In essence: LOOK FOR LEADERS WHO HAVE A PRIMARY FOCUS OF SUPPORTING THE YOUTHS OF THEIR ORGANIZATION OR COMMUNITY

2. EMPOWERMENT

The best role-models are looking to advance those that they are guiding. They will do everything possible to ensure that the outcome of being a leader is that those being guided conclude their journey in a better place than they started. Watch how they operate with the children. They should provide growth opportunities, leadership opportunities, define goals, and instill lessons for the children they lead. True empowerment of the individual will result in any individual child having a clear understanding of incremental goals they should be working. The child will also develop a comfort communicating with mentors what the challenges they may be facing in meeting those goals are. True empowerment of the group will result in all members of the the same team or group being able to provide both technical and emotional support to each other.

In essence: LOOK FOR LEADERS WHO STRENGTHEN INDIVIDUALS AND THE GROUP THROUGH COMMUNICATION, CLARITY, AND GOAL DEVELOPMENT OF THE YOUTHS OF THEIR ORGANIZATION OR COMMUNITY

3. CREATIVITY

After all, we need to find a way to keep the interest of the developing minds! In my experience, you have to be somewhat creative to engage a child or an adolescent. There has to be some element of experimentation in the activities of a team or hobby group. Without it, the children will become bored. That being said, the children need to learn the difference between “fun play time” and “focused hard work” time. There is a place for both in the group’s practices. What mini-games can be implemented to make the exercises fun for the kids? Yes, the hardest working teams usually win the most trophies. But the kids are only going to work hard if they enjoy what they’re doing.

Example

I am a member of a Brazilian jiu-jitsu gym in Hartsdale, NY (Essentials Jiu Jitsu). One day, I got to class about 15 minutes early and had the chance to watch the kid’s class finishing up before my class began. I watched the kids sparring for the first 5 minutes of my time observing. After that, they lined up to play DODGE BALL! The kids were having fun the entire class, but to finish with dodge ball was an added treat.

But wait, why would a coach of a jiu-jitsu team have the class play dodge ball? Well it:

1. Allowed the kids to participate on a team for an activity (and believe it or not, even though jiu-jitsu is an individual sport, it is DEFINITELY a team community that helps you grow your capabilities).
2. Is still athletic and allows the kids to get all-around exercise while switching up the routine
3. Teaches hand-eye coordination
4. Makes the kids want to come back because not only do they love jiu-jitsu, but they are also excited for the next time there will be a super awesome unexpected activity!

In essence: FIND A LEADER THAT KNOWS HOW TO BLUR THE LINES OF A PRACTICE TO KEEP THINGS FUN AND EXCITING FOR THE KIDS WHILE MAINTAINING THE STRUCTURE NEEDED FOR THE SPORT / ACTIVITY

Just the basics

Of course there are more great leadership qualities. A quick google search will give you all sorts of keywords: Honesty, integrity, inspiration, commitment, passion, communication, accountability, delegation, innovation. And yes, those are all very important (and I’m sure there are even more). But if you think about it, they fit like puzzle pieces into INTENTION, EMPOWERMENT, and CREATIVITY. It’s a good “catch-all” model of what to look for. Always go with your gut and get to know the reputation of the organization your child is apart of. Often times, the organizations can fill you in on why their instructors / coaches are such great leaders. Feel free to practice them as the role-models of your own household and teach the oldest siblings the concepts too – your child probably looks to family for guidance first!

The post 3 Things to Look For in Coaches, Mentors, or Leaders for your Child appeared first on Frankie Grixti.

We’re not going to be working on new chapters today. Instead, today, I’m really interested in discussing simple moments of your day. The ones that don’t necessarily change your circumstances, but instead give you a little extra gas in your “motivation tank” to get through your work day or work week. Maybe these will even help you to still have motivation when your shift is over so that you can start working on those life-changing opportunities. But for today, let’s enjoy 2 Food Joys!

1. Food Break Joy

For me, the hardest part of getting through the day is finding myself in that rut where if feels like the clock isn’t moving. The day is going by SO slowly, I have SO many hours left, and I have NOTHING to look forward to until my shift ends.

So how do we break this up?

Well, I think if you ask most people who are having a rough morning at work what the best part of their shift is going to be (other than clocking out) will be their lunch break. Let’s think about why:

• Eating breaks up the monotony of the day
• It gives you stimulation through your tastebuds
• You get to take a few moments to mentally and/or physically rest from the chaos of the day
• People ENJOY eating

So what if we apply the benefits of a lunch break to mini breaks that can give the same benefits. I’m a big advocate for people allowing themselves several “checkpoints” throughout the day. I’m prepared to use myself as an example!

What I do:

I don’t like to eat my whole breakfast in one sitting. I used to do that, and it had its benefits. I’d feel nice and full going into work with plenty of nutrition inside my belly. I wouldn’t have to worry about eating for several hours, so I could get straight to work when I arrived at my office. There were days that I was running late to work, so I would just pack my entire breakfast and bring it with me. Sometimes those days would be busy at work, so I’d take a few bites of my breakfast now, do some work, take a few more bites, and do some more work. A breakfast that would normally take me 15 minutes to eat would be spread out over 2 hours. I fell in love with it

Now, every day my breakfast looks something like this (keep in mind I already packed all of this the night before or the morning of work):

• Drink my hot tea in my car on my way to work
• Eat my morning potatoes, peppers, and onions at my office desk while my computer turns on
• Take a break from eating to do some paperwork before my first client shows up
• Take 1 minute to eat half of an avocado before I bring my first client in
• See a couple clients
• Take 1 minute to eat a banana
• Drink my protein shake while I see my next client
• Take 3 minutes to eat a peanut butter sandwich before I see one more client
• LUNCH BREAK

The theory is simple: I give myself little 1 to 3 minute joys that make me feel fueled up for the next “block” of my work day. And at the end of it, I get to look forward to my lunch break. After lunch, I’ll probably have a snack or a piece of fruit for the last portion of the day too. Or maybe I’ll eat it in my car after my shift is over as a reward for a hard day’s work.

But Frankie, I can’t do that because I’m dieting

I hear you. I get it, I am taking advantage of the fact that I have a fast metabolism to squeeze a little extra joy out of the day without any guilt. But take notice, I don’t eat anything unhealthy. I’m actually choosing food that will FUEL me. Stick within your diet plan and find something you can eat guilt free throughout the day. Carrots and hummus, a handful of trail mix or almonds, a cup of yogurt, hard boiled eggs, a small salad. YOU PROBABLY HAVE OPTIONS. Check out these healthy snack ideas if you can’t come up with any of your own.

Try this – it breaks your day up into bite sized chunks, it positively reinforces you several times after completing each “chapter” of your work day, and you get a nice burst of stimulation to break up the mundane work environment you may work in.

2. Meal Prep Joy

So I wouldn’t recommend something that requires work if I wouldn’t be willing to do it myself. I anticipate some people may disagree with me on this one, but I think it is EXTREMELY important to consider meal prepping for your week. I personally have Sunday mornings blocked out for my meal prep. In this time, I make simple dishses that cover my breakfast, lunch, and dinner for Monday through Friday. I use my oven and roast a lot things, I cook enough grains for the week, I prepare any chicken or meats I’ll be eating and get those grilled up too. Once I have all of my food prepped, I start breaking them down into individual containers for each meal of each day.

Don’t believe me? Here’s the final product of my meal prep from last week:

If you’re wondering where I got that glassware, I highly recommend these

But how does this help you get through the work day?

Well for starters, it supports our first point by letting you be organized enough to have a selection of food to munch on throughout your work day. Also, isn’t it SO disheartening to work a full challenging day at work knowing you still have to go home, cook dinner, and clean up? You always have the option to eat out or pick up a pizza on your way home, but that gets expensive to do 5 days per week. It also probably isn’t meeting your ideal health goals, is it? It makes your work day end with grace and allows you time when you get home. What you do with that time is up to you – Put your feet up and enjoy some productive relaxation. Go exercise. Start working on job applications if you aren’t happy in your current place of employment. Spend time with your friends or family.

I think if you try this and get good at it, you’ll find that there’s no going back. It takes me about 2 to 3 hours each Sunday to have all of my food ready for the week. The cleanup is quick and easy – I just have to wash the containers from the day. So invest in some oven sheets, pans, containers, seasonings, and your own time. You’ll be glad you did!

The post 2 Ways to Use Food to Make Your Work Week More Enjoyable appeared first on Frankie Grixti.

Today, I’ll be focusing on a specific challenge that is very therapeutic for conquering phobias, discomforts, anxiety provoking situations, and allow for an opportunity to grow competence and confidence. For lack of a better name, I’ll refer to it as the Exposure Therapy Challenge – It’s a great exercise to practice as an individual, to challenge your friends or children to do, or to encourage our clients to try (but more on that later).

What is Exposure Therapy?

Before I explain what the challenge is, we should define what Exposure Therapy is first. A quick Google search will explain that Exposure Therapy is essentially the act of having a therapy client experiencing a phobia or specific anxiety become gradually more exposed to the source of their angst without causing any danger.

Quick Example

Let’s say you had a phobia of snakes, as many people do. In theory, a therapist may increase your exposure to your phobia by taking the following steps in order over the course of several weeks:

1. Talk about the physical details of a snake
2. Draw a snake
3. View a cartoon images of snakes
4. Progress to watching animated cartoons of snakes
5. Continue onto realistic drawings of snakes
6. Eventually look at images of small sized snakes
7. See images of larger snakes
8. Finally look at videos of snakes
9. Visit a pet store to look at small snakes through the glass window
10. Hold a small snake

This is an overly simplified treatment plan, but you get the idea – a gradual increase in exposure. This can be applied to anxiety provoking situations as well on a much more day-to-day scale. More so than with phobias, I want you guys to practice overcoming these day-to-day anxiety provoking situations. You can do that with a PERSONAL CHALLENGE (it actually pairs very nicely with our writing exercises writing exercise post)

Introducing: Exposure Therapy Challenge

Variations of this can be made, but the general idea is simple: every day for a month, you will do something specific that is challenging your anxiety or phobia. For example, my personal anxiety is to ask strangers in public to do something for me. If I’m at the grocery store and someone is standing in front of a shelf I need to get to, you’re more likely to catch me standing there waiting for them to eventually move on their own than you are to see me actually say “excuse me.” It’s in my nature and I just want to improve it. Well on top of that, I’ve recently taken up an interest in photography. Specifically, I’ve been enjoying portrait photography.  –

So I’ve decided to participate in my own version of the Exposure Therapy Challenge

Every day for one month, I am going to go into public with my camera to a place where people tend to congregate in public and ask at least 5 people if I can take their portrait. This is no easy task for me. I imagine I’ll be terribly nervous the first few times. But notice, it’s also not a task that I feel is impossible for me to accomplish. I haven’t done this yet because it’s been too cold here in New York, but when I’m done, I’m hoping to have some experience talking to strangers and catching some cool shots (maybe as cool as this one one of me

And please feel free to follow my instagram! I plan on posting the outcome once I start. I doubt I’ll post everything, but maybe you’ll catch some of my favorites and some in my story

Desired Outcome:

I’m hoping this exercise will give me enough exposure to walking up to people (despite my discomfort) and asking them to participate in an activity with me that may seem a little strange. By practicing this over and over, I’m hoping my comfort level will shift from coming up with the guts to ask someone if I can take their picture to calmly asking for their picture and maybe even following it up with a brief and casual conversation. Ideally, this comfort will bleed into different situations.

Who knows, maybe after doing this for a month I’ll actually be able to ask someone at the super market if they’ll politely move over so that I can grab what I need. Or maybe it will help me on a future job interview…or in a social situation that would otherwise be a bit uncomfortable. And maybe the next time I try this challenge, I’ll pick something that seems tough, doable, and would have previously been impossible for me to complete.

Takeaway

Now I ask you:
What do you need exposure to?
What can you challenge yourself to do every day that’s tough but doable?How can you hold yourself accountable?

If you decide to do this, share below what your challenge will be if you feel comfortable. I’m sure it will help inspire other readers! Maybe you should capture it and post it on your social media – let me know if you do! Every time someone does this it’s helping with the mental health stigma

The post Monthly Exposure Therapy Challenge that Encourages Personal Growth appeared first on Frankie Grixti.

Today I will be sharing my response to the Joe Rogan Experience podcast where he recently interviewed Dr. Phil on February 26, 2019 – I was blown away. This is episode #1254 of the JRE Podcast. If you haven’t had the chance to watch it yet, it can be viewed on Youtube or on any Podcast app for your smartphone.

Initial Instinct

Internal bias is something all therapists have to be actively aware of with their clients. It’s probably good for everyone to try to be aware of it in everyday situations anyway. I admit that going into watching the JRE / Dr. Phil podcast, I was struggling with a preconceived bias. Prior to even hearing that Dr. Phil would be on one of my favorite Podcast channels, I’ve had a little bit of criticism of Dr. Phil’s show. As with all day-time TV shows, The Dr. Phil Show seemed very commercialized and even scripted. After-all, his show is responsible for creating the infamous “Catch Me Outside” celebrity , Danielle Bregoli, who went viral by storm. Thus, I definitely anticipated “hate listening” to this episode of the Joe Rogan Experience.

I have to admit, I was pleasantly surprised – keep reading to see my authentic reaction and a breakdown of some of the more noteworthy moments of the podcast.

Memorable Discussion Points

The Joe Rogan podcast episodes never disappoint in this area. He has some very intriguing interviews about topics that are worth remembering – The Dr. Phil episode was no different.

To me personally, the most incredible moments occurred within the first 40 minutes of the podcast because this is where the most productive conversations in regards to mental health was conducted. I found myself extremely interested at several moments of the first half of this episode.

Here is a list of the top 6 discussion points of the episode:

1. “I don’t think problems are simple at all, but the solutions are often simple.” – 7′ 02″

Only 7 minutes into the podcast, Joe and Dr. Phil start a great discussion on problems people face and the effective behavioral treatments. Dr. Phil expands to say a person may have success if they attempt to “behave your way to success…At some point, you have to stop focusing on why and start focusing on what. Instead of why did it happen, what am I going to do to change it?” After all, theorizing and processing is only useful if it is followed by action. Dr. Phil goes on to speak about the “payoff” of unproductive or destructive behaviors to figure out why we do the negative things that we do. However, he is very specific to mention that the goal of theorizing and processing the “payoff” is to figure out how to “control the behavior.”

2. “Damaged personal truth.” – 13′ 16″

This is a topic that isn’t taught to children at a young age resulting in people growing up to hold onto a terribly destructive mentality that dictates their own self-value. A monumental part of therapy is positive regard towards your client: helping them to recognize their own self worth. As Dr. Phil goes on to explain to Joe, we feel “second class” based on the negative life experiences we have, yet we compare ourselves to “everybody else’s social mask.” This is especially true in the world of social media where we all try to present as our best selves.

If we constantly compare ourselves to other people’s public presentation of themselves, we will always feel that we are trailing others. This happens because we know about the negative aspects of our own lives but only see the most polished versions of other people’s lives. This results in thoughts of lowered self-worth and acceptance of lower standards for ourselves. This is a conversation to have with your clients, your children, your family, and your friends because we all deserve to see ourselves as the best we can authentically be.

3. “Incremental changes over the long haul.” – 15′ 34

Joe Rogan says this one so perfectly that it shouldn’t be summarized: “If these two boats are going in a parallel direction and one of them just shifts 5 degrees, over the course of time this boat is going to be in a far different place than the other boat that’s going the same way it was always going.”

Dr. Phil responds so perfectly that it shouldn’t be summarized either: “The next year is going to go by whether you’re doing something about your life or not…They may think, ‘I’m so far away, I’ll never get it under control’ or ‘I’m so far behind on my bills,’ or ‘I’m so depressed and everything is so out of control.’ Well you make those incremental changes and then pretty soon…you go ‘hey, I’m way better off than I was in February,’ and if you don’t you’re just in deeper so every little bit matters.”

No need to expand – keep that in mind as your year keeps going

4. “There’s a stigma attached to mental illness.” 18′ 10″

I was PERSONALLY very happy to hear Dr. Phil and Joe discuss this topic seeing how I just recently wrote about the mental health stigma. Dr. Phil encourages us to speak about our mental illness and mental health the same way we speak about other health concerns and that it should be accepted so that we can support each other to get help and get past whatever challenges we’re facing. That’s the whole point of this website! Let’s help each other to help ourselves!

5. “I’m very slow to medication. I think you use medication for biochemical replacement.” – 19′ 18″

From the 19 minute mark of the podcast to about the 38 minute mark, there was an in depth discussion about prescription medication between Joe and Dr. Phil. This field is evolving, no doubt about it. Conversation about medication abuse, the financial bias of prescribing medication, addiction in general, and solving symptoms of a mental health diagnosis through the use of only talk therapy is becoming more and more common.

Dr. Phil explains in the case of depression that often people are reacting to the reality of a terrible situation and that “pain is a motivator.” He goes on to tell a story about how the physical pain of standing barefoot on hot asphalt will motivate you to run to the cool grass. He explains that the pain of depression is no different in its ability to motivate us. People will have a natural drive to fix the situations that are causing them emotional distress.

It is worth noting that he is NOT against the use of medication. Even in the case of depression, he goes on to explain that psychiatric medication can be used to essentially springboard someone into improving their lives. Dr. Phil explains that this is especially useful for someone with depression who has what is referred to as “psychomotor retardation, the lessening in activity level…you think slower, less actively. You behave less actively. Your chance of getting rewarded goes down.” Someone affected in this way can start a temporary medication treatment. This will help a person to get an initial mood boost that supports him or her to work on certain aspects of life which in turn allows the person to boost their own mood without medication. At this point the medication can be taken away. He also explains that meds that treats psychotic diagnoses such as Schizophrenia will allow a person to function in a talk therapy environment where they otherwise would not.

Finally, Joe and Dr. Phil discuss the opioid epidemic that is occurring in the United States where addictive and dangerous painkillers are overprescribed. On a platform as influential as the Joe Rogan Experience, this conversation is incredibly significant in our shifting the American society. I encourage you to be very careful in the medication you take and work with your doctor in a very conservative fashion to ensure that you are being safe with your prescribed medicine. As Dr. Phil emphasizes, opioids and antidepressants are overprescribed in this country and are the cause of many deaths, addictions, and lower level of functioning.

6. “Overindulgence is one of the most insidious forms of child abuse.” – 1 hr 18′ 36″

Expansion: “If you overindulge your children and do everything for them you never let them observe themselves master their environment. You never let them step back and say ‘Wow, I did that”

Dr. Phil starts this discussion about not letting your children have experiences that let them know that they are capable of putting their mind to something and persevering leading to lost lessons. A supporting criticism of this approach to parenting is little league sports for children where they don’t keep score. There is value to losing, especially as a child. Remember when Dr. Phil mentioned that we’re motivated by pain? Well, there’s pain in losing and there’s an increased motivation to win. This translates to the adult experience. Imagine a world of adults who were overly coddled, never experienced loss, and never really challenged themselves to become victorious.

Joe Rogan: “At some point in their lives, those winners were losers.”
Dr. Phil: “Oh, that’s what made them winners.”

The Payoff

More than anything, I think this interview served as a platform to have several important discussions about the mental health challenges we face as a society. The Joe Rogan Experience has an impressive 4.7 million subscribers on Youtube. This episode alone may not change much overnight, but it allowed many people to become engaged in a topic and problem that they may have been experiencing without understanding. As more knowledge spreads, hopefully more change will come.

What did you think about this episode of the Joe Rogan Experience? Comment below!

The post 6 key points of the JRE Podcast with Dr. Phil appeared first on Frankie Grixti.

Pick at least one exercise and make a goal to practice it at least two times per week up to once per day. Whether you think you are a good writer or not, try these! After all, they are private writing exercises that nobody has to see except for you so there is no excuse and no shame.

1. Positive Poetry

Create a poetry series – Not just any poetry though – create a series of poetry where you speak about yourself in a positive way. These poems can be very literal or creative. My girlfriend and I did this daily for a few weeks, kept them in our Notes app in our Iphone and shared them with each other after we wrote them. After a few weeks passed I found myself looking back on what I wrote in the past and reflecting on where I was as a person at the time of writing them. I noticed that the default way I was thinking about myself began to shift in an optimistic direction. Don’t be afraid to develop your own style and find pride in the process – After-all, nobody has to read them but you. As long as their meanings make sense to YOU, they are serving their purpose.

2. Gratitude Reminders

Give yourself a chance to be reminded of how many things are going wonderfully in your life. On a daily or weekly basis, write down on a piece of paper some of the things that happened to you that you are grateful for since your last entry. You can pick small moments or large ones that impacted you in a positive way. Write down as many as you’d like.

I personally chose to do this for an entire year as a New Year’s resolution. At the end of the year, I read all of them and found myself smiling about how many amazing things happened to me on a regular basis that I may not have even remembered. Try it – you may be surprised when you’re reminded just how amazing your year, month, or week was.

3. Affirmations

This one is great for transitioning private exercises into practicing therapeutic thoughts in the real world. Affirmations are done very privately, but can be used to ready yourself for situations that may create stress or challenge.

An affirmation can be thought of as an emotionally supportive concept that is stated factually. When applied towards yourself, you can theoretically train yourself to think about your own identity and capabilities in a positive and productive way! Pick a few traits that you’d like to develop in your personality. Write them down every day in an “I am…” fashion. Repeat them to yourself. Have your phone send you a reminder throughout the day affirming you. Say them repetitively. Do this for several weeks and you’ll find your own thoughts to begin to shift in a favorable way and your behaviors will likely follow.

Here is an example I wrote and repeated to myself for months as I was preparing for some upcoming professional challenges I would be facing:

I am
Cool
Calm
Creative
Competent
Confident

This would be on repeat for me every day. For example, I would repeat this over and over every day in my writing. I would also have my Amazon Alexa remind me in the morning before I got out of bed. I would think about this phrase repetitively I was getting ready in the morning or while I was meditating. I’d say it in a rhythm that matches the pace I was running while I was exercising. It became engrained it in my mind and I trained myself to believe it. Soon after, my behaviors matched my belief. Soon after, my progress matched my behaviors. I highly recommend this as a regular written, thinking, and speech exercise.

Final thoughts

Get creative. If you are a musician or an artist, mix things up. I write and recommend writing because it comes most naturally to me and is something almost anyone can do. If you would rather figure out ways to turn this into art or some other activity that resonates with YOU, I say GO FOR IT. Just try to be consistent and try to believe in the process. Good things will follow! If you have any other ideas people can try, feel free to comment them down below. I’m sure someone will find your suggestion very helpful.

There are plenty of other ways to work on feeling happier and more optimistic. If you ever feel bad about reserving some time to leisure activities, you should consider reading my post to reframe that guilt into productivity.

The post 3 Writing Exercises to Default to Happiness and Practice being Optimistic appeared first on Frankie Grixti.

We all have that challenge choosing between doing the things we want to do and doing the things we need to do. As parents and as individuals, we need to encourage achieving personal goals and participate in a healthy balance of what we want to do.

To the parents

Exploration is important for your child. From a toddler age through to early adulthood, exploration is key. We need to be supporting our youth in trying different things, learning to master fun skills, meet new people, and engage in the world around them. They may get some bumps and bruises along the way, but scars make for the best lessons, I always say. You want a child to taste different things and get a sense of what they like, and just as importantly: what they DON’T like.

With the right amount of freedom and support, you’ll get to sit back and watch your children find motivation in the things that are authentically important to them. They will find motivation in seeking victory or avoiding losses. They will find motivation in identifying their own sense of accomplishment and skill level. They will gain confidence to apply to different areas. They will find motivation in their ability to learn. Their ability to fall and get back up. Their ability to try. Their ability to compete. Their ability to thrive against all odds. You cannot take this away from their development because you’d be depriving them of some of life’s most rewarding experiences…the experience of understanding and believing in yourself. The experience of confidence and competence.

To the rest of the world

Take a lesson from the kids in the paragraph above. I bet you’re a big kid yourself…who says you can’t have the same experiences now that you’re all grown up? Go try that instrument you’ve always wanted to learn. Or go on that trip you’ve wanted to take. Go practice photography. Have you ever seen YouTube tutorials? There are plenty of things to learn and try. You just have to choose the ones that resonate with you and chip away at them little by little…as little as 30 minutes a week. Do this for a few months and see if it transpires over to the workflow in the obligations of your life. Don’t be surprised if you find yourself with more drive and efficiency. You may surprise yourself with just how self-motivating you can actually be!

The post How Working on Personal Goals and Hobbies Will Make You More Productive appeared first on Frankie Grixti.

The post Seeking Help? How to Manage the Mental Health Stigma appeared first on Frankie Grixti.

The post Mandated Clients – How therapists can get clients engaged with this approach appeared first on Frankie Grixti.